Jump On Board!

Along with coconut, mushrooms, and pleated pants, I HATE the word bandwagon.

Bandwagon is often thrown around as an insult and I sometimes understand this (Pink Hats), but depending on how you personally feel, sport is either a business or entertainment. And in either case, people who jump on the "bandwagon" are smart. And by that rationale, people who jump OFF the "bandwagon" are also smart.

I love when a super fan says, "I've loved the Bruins for 25 years! I've been watching them since I was a kid! All these new 'bandwagon' fans who know nothing about the team suck! I was wit the Bees since the beginning!"

Well you know what that makes those super fans look like? Super idiots.

Why would I pay inflated ticket, food, and beer (well actually, we know I'll pay anything for beer) prices for an inferior product? When a movie sucks or a car sucks or a restuarant sucks, we don't buy their ticket, product, or food respectively. 88 Minutes sucked. Should I pay $10.50 to see it because I was "there with Al Pacino since the beginning?" If M. Night's The Happening blows, should I pay for a ticket because I liked his The Sixth Sense, which is ten years old? No. And if I did, everyone would tool on me.

For some reason, bandwagon fans are crucified. But why wouldn't someone NOT pay for or waste their time watching an inferior product? Should I re-purchase a Dodge Stratus (insert Will Ferrell joke here) because I bought one twelve years ago and I'm loyal to it even though it was the suckiest thing I ever spent money on (it was even worse than a cup of Honey Dew coffee)? I think you know the answer to that.

So with all of that in mind, I have this to say about The-So-Awesome-That-David-Stern-Is-Spooging-As-We-Speak Celtics-Lakers matchup: Jump on the bandwagon kids. There's plenty of room and I'm glad- as a fan of a whole fifteen years- to have you on board. If for no other reason than I know have someone to drink with.

If you haven't been watching, this is so fun. As I've said countless times this year, the Celtics have one of the most enjoyable sports teams in recent memory. They aren't even close to jumping the shark (as the Sox have) and they don't have near the annoying traits/coach that the Patriots have. And while the Bruins were relevant for a couple of nights in April, they are still the Bruins.

I know that many of you hate the NBA because you hate the NBA of 1994. But while you were cursing the 74-69 games the Knicks and Pacers used to play, the NBA got good. Really good. I've said this before, but I'll say it again. Scores were way up. The Suns, Nuggets, and Warriors showed you could play 80s style basketball and win. There are tons of stars in the league (enough to even beat your '86 All Star Team Hayes) and the rules not allowing high school players into the league have let you develop some familiarity with players who you watched in college. The NBA game is great now and the league is loaded with stud players and very, VERY good teams (Side note. For years, people who hate the NBA game claim that it is no longer a "team game" and that it is all individual all the time. While this may be true in some peoples eyes, I find it strange that the two teams who play most like TEAMS- Detroit and San Antonio- are the two most hated teams in the league. That would seem to be a paradox.).

But this isn't an The NBA Is Awesome post. It is a The Celtics Are Awesome post. And because the Cees are awesome, entertaining, fun, likable, and play really, REALLY good basketball, you should jump on the banwagon. There is no Curt Schilling or Rodney Harrison on the team. There are no steroid allegation or Spygate stories. They don't have an annoying flopper like Manu Ginnobli or a goofy useless talent like Anderson Varejo. They have a bunch of great personalities who can straight up PLAY.

And so the next two weeks are going to be a blast. I am by no means a lifelong Cees fan- when Bird, Parish, and McHale were dominating, I was wondering why the Sox weren't keeping Spike Owen- but I've loved them these past few years. Yes, that's strange, given what you just read about an inferior product, but I like the NBA, they had (let me say again: Had) cheap seats, the games are fast and easy to get to, there are a surprisingly high number of hot women at the games, and most importantly, I like drinking on Friday nights. And the Celtics always have a Friday night home game. So even though they sucked, it seemed appropriate to follow the Celtics. And while I never yelled at people for not watching a 15 win team, the lack of Celtics Super Fans here on June 5th is surprising.

So rather than yell at you, I want to tell you again: Get on board the bandwagon. Find a guy to love, be it House, Powe, Big Baby, or James Posey. Find a YOOOOOOOOOOUUUUUUUUUUK!!!!!!!!!! to cheer for. Bust out you Beat LA shirt from 1985 (or ask Morgy from Good Will Hunting if you can borrow his), cheer for Ray Ray when he drains a three, and go crazy when KG blocks an after the whistle shot. But whatever you do, WATCH THESE GAMES!!!!! It's your basketball team! In the NBA Finals! Against the best in the west! Against Kobe, the A-Rod and Peyton Manning (meaning athletes who irrational Boston sports fans hate) of the NBA! Against Phil Jackson, the guy who could break Red's coaching title record!

At the very least, come drink with me. That will be fun. Not so much my company (which is rarely fun), but the fact that it will give you something to do. There is only two things I ask that you NOT do: Don't cheer for Scalabrine when he gets put in and don't criticize Doc because he knows what he's doing and you don't.

So drink up. Go Cees. It'll take seven games, but banner #17 is on its way.